Try a little kindness

       Kindness is one of those words that has gotten misused and waylaid these days.  "Kind" and "nice" have become to be seen as traits that are tepid and mousy - almost more of an insult than compliment.  When someone asks you how they did and you don't know quite how to respond, "That's nice" seems to work as an answer - except with children.  During the days when the refrigerator was covered with art work, I was often asked to critique the latest effort.  More than once, my "That's nice" earned me, "I know, Mom but how is it?"  

       Children are not learned in social rules of adults.  Ask a child how they are and they will tell you.  On the other hand, I have visited adults in intensive care who will assure me when asked that they "are fine, thank you."   Children are much more apt to speak their minds without censoring themselves to be "nice" - which can be embarrassing for the adults around them.   

       Both being nice and being kind, require empathy, a skill children have to learn.   Empathy is being able to understand another person's emotions and how your words and actions may affect someone else.  It is the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes.   Some experts now say that if children don't see empathy modeled and don't learn it by the age of 4 or 5, they may never learn it.    People who don't care /can't care about what happens to other people are the most dangerous kind of people.   There have been enough examples of genocide and violence to teach us this.

       Thinking about how our actions affect other people is a simple way to allow our lives be shaped by faith.  Jesus says over and over in the Gospel of John, that we are to be known by how we love each other.  How is that possible?  Do we all have to become pastors or religious figures?  It can sound so difficult, demanding, and weird to live faith everyday, as if we are being asked to become someone else than who we are.  Instead, think of it in little steps.  

       Remember the little sign on video rentals "be kind, rewind"?  It can begin as simple as that - can a simple action on my part save someone else from having to pick up the paper I leave behind; offer to get someone else a cup of coffee when I get my own;  a kind smile instead of a complaint when waiting in line at the checkout.  Or my sister's line - 'turn off the light when you leave the room to save a polar bear'.  

       Being kind is nothing more nor less than caring for the people around you.  It is not earned or asked for but it greatly affects the people around us.  The CEV (Contemporary English Version) of the Bible translates Galatians 6:18 as this: "My friends, I pray that the Lord Jesus Christ will be kind to you! Amen."  That kindness saved us all.